Got baby fever? I can help you with that.

Pregnancy is the best birth control.  Besides the fact that it's not possible to get pregnant while already pregnant, being pregnant is the best way to cure the baby fever that might creep up on you in the future.

Too late?  You already have the fever...the crazy overwhelming desire to have another squishy baby right-this-minute to love and nurture forever?  Baby, baby, baby is all you can think about both night and day?  You see pregnant women everywhere and are insanely jealous of their cute baby bump?

I've been there and I can help you with that.  Full term pregnancy is the cure, possibly the only cure, for baby fever.

Let me remind you of just how terribly uncomfortable it gets in the last week(s)...

• I must lasso my underwear on in the morning, hoping to rope in that leg before I fall over.
• It is painful to stand, or sit, or lay down for more than ten minutes at a time.
• When you tell someone when your baby is due they literally take a step back, like you are going to give birth right then, on them.
• Having the urge to pee again the second you stand up from peeing, and yet again the second you leave the bathroom. And again five minute later.
• Heartburn and indigestion from drinking water...um, yes, it happens.
• Putting on your own shoes is a dangerous act and bending down to put on your toddler's shoes is worse.
• Torturing yourself with your own thoughts, "Will the baby come today?" and "What was that pain?" is enough to drive yourself insane.
•  Pregnancy face...enough said.

Are you cured yet?

Must I remind you that NONE of your clothes will fit you that last week?  Or that if you think you are tired now, just wait until that baby comes? (You know it's true.  Pregnancy is the best cure for baby fever.)

How about this basketball sized belly...does this help break your fever?

So yeah, technically this shirt still fits, but it use to work with leggings.  Not anymore.

You're pregnant, that's why...

Seems to be the response I've been getting lately, and it makes total sense.  I am the pregnant lady that often forgets she's pregnant.

Why am I so tired (at noon)?

Why am I hungry again (an hour after breakfast)?

Why do the muscles in my hips and butt hurt?

Why am I having trouble falling asleep at night?

Why can't I finish this run without stopping to pee at least twice?

Why can't I lift this?

Why is everything so hard?

Why is this ice cream my dinner?

I'm pregnant, that's why!

This second pregnancy is a whole new ball game.  Last time around I thought I had a hard time sleeping at about 18 weeks.  This time, I KNOW what not sleeping is really all about after having a newborn.

Last time I was on summer break with three months left of the pregnancy.  This time, I am starting work with about two months to go.

Last time I read books and websites that told me how I should be feeling.  This time I can't forget the fact that labor is more difficult than any pregnancy symptom ever.

So when is it going to hit me?  When am I going to allow myself to feel pregnant? When am I going to start making excuses?

What a year!

This year has been one of exciting changes, fun-filled days, and hope for the future.

I started the year with a plan to work on myself.  After all the not-so-awesome changes we faced in 2011, I was ready to start over and lose the baby weight (even though Leila was a toddler), get out of my yoga pants, and make some mommy-friends.

I can happily say, one year later I feel so much better about myself.  Thanks for encouraging me on my weight-loss journey.  I set a goal, met it, and plan to do it all over again this summer!

Meeting Lauren and Charlie was one of the biggest things that happened to Leila me this year!  It got us out of our park rut, gave Leila a best friend, and allowed me to officially say I had made my first mom-friend.  It has been so fun watching Leila and Charlie grow this year, as individuals and as friends.  For me, making a new friend that shares many of my parenting views, my need to cuss, and desire to have a balanced life changed my outlook on this stay-at-home mom gig.  It's been a win-win for us all!

This year Jeff and I enjoyed our first vacation away from Leila.  The two of us headed up the coast to San Francisco for a long weekend.  It was just what a vacation should be...carefree.  We both missed Leila, but were happy to have missed her first case of the flu.

Summertime proved to be too hot for me, both here and during our three week trip to Chicago.  It was great to see my family and friends and I know they enjoyed seeing us too.  It's hard living so far away from so many people you love.

After our vacation I was sure I had the world's worst hangover.  Turns out it wasn't just the pile of mail, the unpacking, or the 100 degree heat that was getting to me. I found out I was eight weeks pregnant when I returned from our Chicago trip.  It was the biggest surprise of the year, and I still have moments when I can't believe this is really happening.

Leila had a big birthday in September!  Two, as everyone promised, has be kind of nuts.  Leila certainly has a personality all her own (or maybe she gets a little of it from me).  She's funny, sweet, a little bossy, and has a strong desire to be independent.  Our days are mostly wonderful, but some days feel much longer than others.  

The future here in Leilaland is hopeful, a little scary, and exciting all rolled into one.  I don't know exactly how it will play out, but I am sure it will involve some Mommy meltdowns, toddler tantrums, and lots and lots of love.  (Oh, and a new blog name too.  Suggestions are welcome!)

Happy New Year everyone! 

Unsolicited pregnancy advice

Back in 2010, when I was 35 weeks pregnant with Leila, I found out that two of my best friends from home were expecting their first child.  I decided to share with them some of the things I had learned along my journey. 

Now my youngest sister is 36 weeks pregnant with her first child (my first nephew!)  I revisited the list of advice I titled: Candid Pregnancy Advice from a VERY Pregnant Jen and sent it to her too.

Well...just today, I found myself NOT following my own advice! (Will I ever learn?)  So I figured it was time to revisit my list once again, to remind myself of what I learned the first time around, and share it with you.

Candid Pregnancy Advice from my VERY Pregnant Self:

• Trust your instincts! Enough said. 

• Do not research anything on the internet! Just like no one talks about how many people made it home safely (without getting shot, stabbed, in a car accident, or plane crash) the internet only tells the BAD stuff. Make a promise to yourself that you will not research pregnancy related symptoms online. 

• Yes it’s normal. What?!!? Yep…it’s normal. Anything you can imagine can and will happen to your body. Of course it is important to know the warning signs of something atypical but again, remember #1…trust your instincts. 

• Never look at your butt in the mirror. I am seriously sad that I did. Really…do not. (BIG MISTAKE that I made today!)

• Cellulite will appear in places you never expected. Think of it positively…my baby needs this or it wouldn't happen. 

• It is okay to eat deli meat, drink caffeine (200-300 mg is in a cup of coffee or a soda), hot dogs, AND...ice cream cures everything. 

• You will need to buy bigger underwear. Granny panties rock. 

• Wear your regular clothes as long as possible. Maternity clothes were very exciting at 16 weeks…not so much at 35 weeks when you are still wearing the same stupid maternity clothes. 

• Buy lots of clothes in bigger sizes.  What you wear in the 2nd trimester will not necessarily fit you in the 3rd trimester. 

• Don’t get hung up on the 25-35 lbs weight gain suggested to you by your doctor. It will make you cry and want to eat ice cream when you pass it up. (Unless, of course, your doctor says something to you specifically about your weight gain or lack of at an appointment. Mine laughed at me when I was concerned saying that no one really stays within those guidelines.) 

• Buy lots of toilet paper. You will pee 800 times a day/night. I sit down, pee, wipe, stand up and repeat (2 or 3x) before I am ready to leave the bathroom. Lean forward when you pee to get the last few drops out.

• You will be thirstier than you ever imagined. Water will keep you from major swelling, but 3rd trimester swelling will come. It will be funny when you can’t make a fist, see your ankle bones, have chubby knees, and fingerprints leave indents in your legs. 

• Everything (yes, even an apple) can give you heartburn and indigestion. Be smart and take Tums before you eat. 

• Prune juice is not so bad. Splurge on the good shit…the generic is just not the same. It works wonders and is totally necessary.   I drink it daily. Just close your eyes because it looks a little like au jus. 

• One word: EXERCISE. It boosts your mood, helps you poop, and keeps you from feeling bad about the shit you ate the day before. 

• Take weekly pictures of your belly. You will look back and laugh at when you “thought you looked pregnant” (me at week 10) and pray to just have that little bloated bump again someday! 

This last one is so true.  Here's the first bump picture of this pregnancy...
  

Huge at 13 weeks, huh?!

What would pregnancy advice would you need to remind yourself of the second (or third) time around?

We don't share toys.

I know what you are thinking...What?! How can you possibly be raising a decent human being without teaching the basic rule of sharing...and why on Earth are you telling people?!

Think about the last time you toddler had something another child wanted, or wanted something that another child was playing with.  What did you say to your child?  Did you tell them to share?

Before we stopped sharing toys, the conversations I had with Leila, when a child wanted the toy she was currently playing with, went something like this:

Leila, you need to share your shovel.  

No.  Mine.

When you're done give it to the boy.  We share.

When I finally realized what I was saying, I realized I was actually asking her to take turns, not share her shovel.  I didn't expect her to give up the shovel immediately just because another kid wanted to use it.  I wouldn't give up my parking spot just because someone else wanted it.  They'd have to wait until I was finished with my turn.

Sounds like simple semantics, right?  Sharing vs. turn taking.  But there is a difference.  Heather Shumaker, author of It’s OK Not to Share…And Other Renegade Rules for Raising Competent and Compassionate Kids (Tarcher/ Penguin, 2012) wrote a must-read guest post on the Positive Parenting Solutions blog that confirmed what I was witnessing.

I noticed when I used this different terminology with Leila she got it.  She started taking turns, even without me making a big deal out of it.

Taking her turn with the bucket.

So, do we share anything?  Yes.  We share our snack because we both can have some.  We share our crayons because there is enough for everyone to have one to use.  We can even share play-dough by breaking off a piece of our and giving it to a friend.

But most of the time we take turns.  We use something as long as we want it, and when we are finished, someone else can have their turn.  If she wants something, she waits her turn.  Turn-taking teaches positive assertiveness and patience, two life skills not all adults have.

So go ahead, stop making your kid share their toys, take turns instead!  You'll be doing everyone a favor.  

Strange pregnancy symptom

I don't really know how to say this, or why I am even telling you this in the first place.  Hopefully it will help some freaked out pregnant lady in the future.  More likely you'll get a giant laugh out of my confession, then Google my symptom like I did.

My pregnant butt is turning the toilet seat BLUE!*  

For reals.  There is a nicely blue-dyed ring on my otherwise white toilet seat.  It won't come off; not with bathroom cleaner, not with Magic Eraser (if that stuff doesn't work then nothing will!).  These are some seriously crazy hormones people.  Or maybe I'm secretly a smurf. 

Nothing else is blue.  Trust me.  I checked my butt and the undergarments it has touched.  My sheets aren't blue like some women have reported.  I did notice that one side of my cross-body diaper bag is dyed blue, and I still blame the new shirt I was wearing.  I did not however, sit on the toilet seat with this new blue shirt covering my butt and thighs.

Is this what having a boy is all about?!

Ever heard of this strange pregnancy symptom? 

Should I be worried?

*After further investigation, I have discovered that it was in fact my dark blue maternity jeans that caused the blue tint on the toilet seat.  I first noticed the blue toilet seat on Saturday, the day after I wore these jeans.  Today I wore the jeans again.  There was not visible blue dye on my butt or thighs, but after wiping my body down with a baby wipe to test this theory, I discovered I did indeed have a blue baby wipe.  Go figure, my toilet seat is a brighter shade of blue as well.  I am not a smurf after all.  Phew.  

Truth time {SAHM life}

Truth is, everyday is not easy.  It's not all glitter and rainbows being a stay-at-home mom.  Some days are more like needles and blizzards.  Others fall into the moldy bread and hail storm category.

The purpose of this blog is to document our days, good, bad and everything in between.  Naturally I leave out the bad because a.) I don't want to remember those days. b.) No one likes a "negative Nancy".

Today though, I need to document our tough, "I wish I could just go to work" kind of day.  I'll read this post again one day as a reminder that I made it out alive.  A reminder that bad days exist.  A reminder that it's okay to have these kind of days.

Today...

• Leila cried, whined, or fussed from the second she got up (early, nonetheless) to the second we managed to leave the house.
• I fed her goldfish crackers to keep her busy.
• The mirror in the bathroom sink has toothpaste splatters all over it...still.
• Is the fifth day in a row I have worn a pony-tail.
• Leila screamed in her crib at nap time when I closed the door.
• I don't plan on making dinner.
• Leila will watch more television than she should.

Today will end, eventually.

Tomorrow...I'll be back to glitter, rainbows, and toddler smiles.